My unborn son, Cody, was diagnosed with spina bifida this week. Spina bifida is an open cord defect in which some portion of the covering over the spinal cord (bone, muscle and skin) has not formed completely, and the nerves of the spinal cord are exposed, causing a wide variety of problems.  In Cody's case the exposed portion is is very low, in the upper sacral area or the lower lumbar. This is good - the less nerve exposure, the less systems effected. The prognosis as far as our doctors can determine is that Cody will have some ability to walk using a walker or ankle braces, that he will have little control over his urinary and bowel functions, and little sensation from the waist down. Spina bifida also causes the spinal cord to be fused to the tailbone, causing it to pull down on the brain as he grows. His cerebellum has already herniated some into his spinal column. This causes a condition called hydrocephalus, in which pockets of fluid around the brain, called ventricles, are unable to drain, and become enlarged, putting excess pressure on the brain. Cody will have to have surgery within 24 hours of his birth to close his spinal lesion, and possibly to place a shunt from his brain to his stomach in order to drain the fluid. He may have to have other surgeries throughout his life. 

I am starting this blog to help keep informed the many, many people who are concerned about Cody's condition, and to record our progress throughout the pregnancy and into Cody's life. Cody's life will not be just about spina bifida, however, so I am expecting this blog to grow into so much more . . . .

Some may wonder why I have titled this blog "The Kindness of God," considering the events that are happening to us right now. Certainly, Cody's condition and the challenges we face don't feel much like a kindness. But God's kindness to us has already, in 6 short days, been very evident. I am sure I will explain more about that later, but for now, I want to tell you about the story of a "handicapped" boy that I have not been able to forget.

Mephibosheth was the grandson of King Saul, in the Bible. He was expected to be a king. But because of his disobedience to God, King Saul was deposed, and King David set up in his place. When Saul was deposed all of his family fled from Jerusalem and went into hiding, expecting the new king to hunt them down and take their lives. In the chaos, Mephibosheth, just a small boy, was dropped by his nurse, and became crippled for life. It was not until many years later that King David even knew that Mephibosheth existed.

After David had secured his reign, he asked his servant, " 'Is there no one still left of the house of Saul to whom I can show God's kindness?' Ziba answered, 'There is still a son of Jonathan [Saul's son and David's best friend]; he is crippled in both feet." 2 Samuel 9:3. David went on to find Mephibosheth and bring him before him. How terrified Mephibosheth must have been - he must have thought that the vengance deserved by his grandfather was to be brought down on his head at last. Instead, David restored to him all the lands that had belonged to his family, and commanded that Mephibosheth, the cripple and the outcast, would eat with David at his table for the rest of his life.

"I can see those little crippled feet swinging under the table with disbelief and delight while their owner incredulously sang, 'Amazing love, how can it be that You, my King, would honor me? It's my joy to honor You!" (Paul Anderson-Walsh, Until Christ is Formed)

My little boy may look different from those around him. But he is no different. We are all born crippled and broken, missing essential pieces to make our lives satisfying and effective. And life, as we go along, deals many a blow that breaks us more. But Jesus, who loves the outcast, the crippled, the blind, the weak, the poor, says,"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28. It is not the whole and proud and strong that He wants. It is the outcast that He loves.

Some will say to me that if I had enough faith, God would heal my son. He never once promised me that. But He did give His own Son, Jesus, to suffer all of the agony that Cody may suffer, so that I can see my little boy sitting at His table, perfect in every way, knowing that he is loved and wanted by the King. That is His kindness to me.